It's never too late to begin.

Rd 8 v Sydney

This is a new blog that I’ve decided to create as a means of catharsis. I understand we're almost half way through the season but hey, no time like the present, especially if things are grim.
See, I’ve been hurting oh so badly of late as I watch teams like Richmond, Essendon and Adelaide (who in previous years have all seriously struggled) show signs of dramatic improvement while Melbourne decides it’s another good year for draft picks. How long can I go on waiting? Can I go on waiting? Well, as is often encouraged in footy circles, let’s chat it out.

I’d like to make clear I’m not asking for sympathy, empathy or any type of ‘thy’ for that matter, just that you don’t laugh in my face. Understand that it’s not easy supporting a team that makes such an art of losing. Chances are you’ve had to do the same at some stage during your life and if you haven’t…well, support Melbourne for a weekend and you'll understand.

But lets look at the stats. The Dees have so far registered a win-loss of 0-8 after 8 games.

We’re conceding an average of 120 points per game and scoring an average of 63.
We’ve won 4 quarters for the year out of a possible 32.

Quick math: That's 1 quarter won every two games. The lowest of any side. I included GWS and Gold Coast in that, don’t bother double checking.

We’re not (barring some form of miracle) going to get a win until round 13 when we play a team in it’s first year fielding players who could count their age on one hand, and even then we’ll more than likely go in as underdogs based on form.

In our most recent loss our coach claimed one of the positives to be “the lack of "complete capitulation" in the latter stages of the game.”

Just question Mark, how do you think it sounds for me to start bragging at the watercooler about how my side didn’t completely die in the arse on the weekend, only partially? Think of the watercooler Mark! Give me something worth repeating.

“Well you know, coming up here and losing by 101 points wasn’t so bad, Grimesy put money on us to lose and had a good win so it’s not all bad. A good captains effort that. Oh and also we didn’t completely capitulate. So yeah. All in all not so bad.”

Whether true or not it works better for me.

This season’s gotten to the point where my body doesn’t seize up at every tight contest (there aren’t many), nor do I lose my voice in support of my side (I’m in the bar trying to find happiness), and the days of clapping the team off the ground following an honourable loss are gone (I’m waiting patiently on platform 9 by that stage).

Sure all of this makes me sound like a terrible supporter and what gives me the right to publicly attack a group of professionals doing their job?...Sort of doing their job. Obviously noone at Melbourne wants to go out and get smacked. I think the aim of this blog will be to document (hopefully) the rise in fortunes that my club and it’s supporters enjoy this season. I’m confident that by seasons end something will have clicked and the tone of these reports will be infinitely more positive, what an interesting journey that will be!…or maybe it’ll go the other way and end with me weeping in a corner of sadness accepting a horrible truth.

Either way, I hope you’ll join me for the ride. Don’t bother with you’re seatbelt, it won’t save you when you’re in these colours.